Director: Craig Moss (2012)
Starring: Danny Trejo, Ron Perlman, Charles S. Dutton
Find it: IMDB
Danny Trejo plays internet meme Frank Vega in Bad Ass, a film about a man who beats up some ne'er-do-wells on a bus. This heartwarming tale is adapted from a real-life incident in which a bearded Vietnam veteran beats the piss out of a ne'er-do-well on a bus, earning himself the moniker 'Epic Beard Man'. Trejo turns the moustache into a
Ron Perlman and Charles S. Dutton are there to spice up the story a little, but they're barely in it. Trejo does fine as Vega, but his beard looks like shit and even he can't hide the fact that the film has nothing relevant to actually say. Director Craig Moss, veteran of such classy pieces as Breaking Wind Part 1 and 30 Nights of Paranormal Activity with the Devil Inside the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo struggles with the tone, resulting in a film that feels like it should be a lot funnier than it is. There's mileage to be had in seeing Trejo battering the piss out of a group of gangbangers (which he can still do more plausibly than, say, Steven Seagal) and his fight with a giant Bond villain knock-off is a lot of fun, but Epic Beard Man: The Movie (a title they should totally have kept) largely comes up wanting. At least it's better than Machete Kills, though.
Somehow, Bad Ass did well enough to get itself a sequel - Bad Asses, co-starring Danny Glover is on its way later this year - but the joke was already wearing thin after five minutes. Stallone should probably let Trejo in his Expendables now, if only to stop him from making Straight to DVD shit like this. Bad Ass is anything but(t).